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Goodbye to Berlin: Why I'm Leaving This City After 15 Years

After 15 years in Neukölln and working in German media, Zara Rahman is leaving Berlin because of dishonesty and moral hypocrisy.

Goodbye to Berlin: Why I'm Leaving This City After 15 Years
Screenshot: "FROM THE RIVER TO THE SEA" (2024) by Maya Saravia, IG @maya_saravia

When white people hear that I’m leaving the country after 15 years, they ask: why? When people of colour hear the same, they say: congratulations.

The answer to that “why”, though, is not what you might expect. I’m a British-Bangladeshi Muslim woman who has lived in Neukölln since 2011. I chose to move to  Neukölln for many reasons: I wanted to blend in rather than standing out; I liked the friendliness in the spätis; and, more recently, I felt proud of the visible signs of Palestinian solidarity. In these many ways, it felt like home. 

Sure, the racism in Germany is startling. I could write a book about the extremely visceral and visible racism that I’ve experienced during my time in Berlin, but I’m not going to. Because those stories and experiences are everywhere, if you choose to see them. And because the actual, main reason that I’m leaving Berlin, isn’t due to that kind of racism. 

It’s not the AfD, nor the rise of the far-right. No. It’s because of the dishonesty within the left and ‘progressive’ part of German society. 

My German, I’m told, is excellent. Partly, this makes it hurt more.